Tip Thursday - Self Awareness

To be as self aware as possible you must consider two key gaps in your potential understanding. First is the gap that exists between what all there is to know about yourself and what you actually know.

Regardless of how old you are, and all that you have done in your life, there are still untapped skills, latent talents and hidden strengths. To narrow this gap you need to continue to challenge yourself with new activities, new experiences, new learnings. You just might uncover an interest and talent residing in you that opens an exciting new chapter in your life.

The second gap is the one that exists between how you see yourself and how others see you. Through their observation of our behaviours others can become privy to information and  insights about us that we don't have. Seek our feedback, remain open to receiving the insight of others, to narrow this gap and come to understand yourself better.

How well we understand ourselves has a profound impact on our ability to interact with others successfully and is the foundation for growing your Emotional Intelligence. If you want to truly be understood by those around you, you must first work to understand yourself.

Just Try It!

We admonish our children to try new things.  'How do you know you won't like it if you don't try it?'

When did we stop applying the same rule to ourselves? When did our concern over possibly looking foolish, or not proving to be the best at something overshadow our desire to step in and give something a 'go'?

In essence... when did we start giving up before we even began?

We once were courageous.  Everything in life was new to us, but we willingly gave new things a try. Crawling, walking, talking, throwing a ball, skipping a stone, catching a frog. Our childhood is comprised of a series of new experiences, times when we willingly stepped forward and tried something new, all strung together.  Remember the delight you experienced when you tried something for the first time and liked it? When you discovered it was fun? Better yet, when you found something you were good at?

What happened to that?

Not trying is giving up before you start

I have a raft of clients lamenting the fact that they haven't discovered anything they are passionate about in their life, yet they are doing so from the comfort of their couch.  You have to explore new experiences to discover those hidden interests, talents and passions. You need a breadth of experiences to learn what you are truly capable of.

We all have undiscovered talents that are waiting to be uncovered. However, we can't build and capitalize on them if we don't know what they are. It is only by pushing ourselves to try new things that we will uncover what those latent talents are.

Experiencing the new helps us...

• Increase our self confidence
• Gain a greater appreciation of ourselves
• Become a more 'interesting' person - we have far more to share with others
• Discover new talents, strengths and passions!
• Live without regrets

So, in the spirit of parents everywhere, get up, get out and get going.  You'll never know unless you try!

People Buy People

People 'buy' People.

What are they 'buying' from you?

Seriously. Think about this. What is it that people get and can expect when they interact and work with you? Is it worth the price?  If what you have to offer is not uniquely different than the person standing next to you, then why would someone choose you?

It starts to feel a little like picking sports teams in grade-school, no one wants to be the last one 'picked' for the team, but this is what happens every day in business.  When you go for an interview, when project teams are being put together, when promotions are being made, when consultants are hired.  Skills, abilities, attitudes and experiences are being bought, which means we are all in the business of selling ourselves.

How good is your sales process?

As with any product, you can't sell what you don't know.  How clear are you about your strengths?  You can't articulate and highlight what you don't know.  Ideally you want to build your brand around the key strengths you possess that are both marketable AND that you enjoy using.  An exercise that I use with clients to help them uncover these strengths is the following...

Take out a piece of paper and draw a quick chart. Down the left-hand column, create a list of your accomplishments and achievements that still instill you with pride. Pride is a key component because if you still feel good about what you achieved you likely used some talents and skills you enjoy.  

Across the top row you are going to list your abilities.  Start with the first accomplishment you listed and consider the various skills and abilities that you called upon to help you complete that task.  List them in the top row, checking each off in the row across from its associated accomplishment.  

Look at the next accomplishment you listed and check off any of the abilities you added that apply to this accomplishment.  Some may have been used while others hadn't.  Add any additional skills that you haven't yet indicated.

Continue to review each accomplishment, checking off any of the abilities you've listed that were used to complete each, while also adding any additional skills/abilities that were also used.

When completed, take a look at the abilities with the most check marks. These likely represent those skills/abilities that you call upon the most and represent your key strengths. Given that these accomplishments are pride-filled moments for you, these strengths are also likely to be things you enjoy doing and are talents that others recognise in you and turn to you for help with. These are the elements that people 'buy' from you.

Knowing what you have to sell to others is one thing, selling it is another.  People can't buy what they don't know is for sale.  What are your marketing strategies?  Doing great work, and letting it speak for you, is one strategy... but it is only one. On its own it is insufficient to ensure that your product - 'you' - stands out on the shelves.  What other strategies could you implement that help you to stand out and be seen?  Here are a couple of quick tips borrowed from our Bragging Rights program to help get you started...

• When you have helped someone out and they thank you, don't ever respond with... 'No problem'.  Ever.  Saying 'no problem' implies that, in fact, it was no problem.  Which is rarely ever true.  Don't diminish the work you did by saying that it was no problem.  Simply saying 'you're welcome' is better, but consider letting them know you went out of your way for them by saying something along the lines of... 'I know how important it was to your project so I juggled a few things to make some room to help you out'.  It never hurts to let someone know you are willing to give a little something extra, which helps differentiate you from the rest of the crowd.
• When you enjoy doing something, let people know... so you can get more of it!  We may be good at many things, but we really only want to work on those that we are both good at AND love doing. Others aren't likely to distinguish between the two if you don't highlight the difference for them.  
• When you meet people that you haven't seen in a while and they ask you what you've been up to, do not... I repeat ... DO NOT simply say 'nothing much', or 'keeping busy'.  Give them some insight. This is a great opportunity to insert a little brag-bite, a short update on something, just one thing, that you have been doing that highlights a strength.  Make it short, snappy, interesting... but start getting the word out about what it is that you can do if you want people to remember it, and you, when great new projects are coming down the pipe.  

People are constantly in the market for people.  People to help bridge the gap between their personal talents and their needs.  Help them to see you as the right fit for that gap by selling yourself appropriately.  People are buying people all the time.  If they are not buying 'you' then it may be time for you to revamp your marketing strategies.
 

 

 

Embracing Limitations

There is a lot of focus in business on the need to 'improve' our weaknesses, to overcome our limitations.  The
assumption being that we don't want weaknesses of any kind, that our weaknesses will hold us back and limit our opportunities.  What if, however, it is not our limitations that hold us back but the way that we think of them?

As long as we perceive our limitations as weaknesses, our limitations as a negative, we put our effort into masking or hiding them, into trying to turn them around or to at least become 'competent' enough in the area that others might not notice.  It becomes a cyclical game in which we put our energy into become stronger in an area that will never be a strength.

What if we put our energy instead, into finding other avenues to getting things done, while working WITH our limitations rather than around them?  We tend to think of creativity being synonymous with the need to think outside of the box.  However, kickstart your creativity by thinking a little closer to home.  Try thinking within the box.  Enhance and spark your creativity by learning to embrace your limitations.

Don't hide your limitations away, pull them out.  Examine them.  Define what the limitation means to you.  Often this definition is accompanied by a 'can't'.  There is something you feel that you can't do as a result of this limitation.  The key question then becomes...  how else might I do it?  Consider...

• If you are an athlete who loses their legs in a car crash, do you stop engaging in your sport?
• If you want to become doctor but don't get accepted into medical school, do you give up on your dream of being a health practitioner?
• If you draw detailed, realistic pictures but develop severe hand tremors, do you stop making art?
• If you stutter, do you avoid speaking in public?

You can't do things as you once did or would want to... what can you do instead?  Don't dwell on what you can't do... focus on what you can.  What is another option or possibility?  If you only view the limitation one way you will only get one answer.  View the limitation from as many different angles as you can to unlock different answers and possibilities, many of which would have been hidden from you had you not shifted your perspective.  

Sometimes we must first become limited to then become limitless

Instead of viewing your limitations as a roadblock to your success, view them as a source of creativity.  Your dream is not gone because of the limitation, you are just required to shift your vision of it or to walk a different path to get there.  Embracing your limitations liberates you from their confines, opening new avenues, new possibilities.  It is from thinking inside the box of our limitations that we end up opening the box fully.