The Failure Conundrum

There are a lot of mixed messages out there around the concept of failure. 

• Business gurus direct entrepreneurs to 'Fail Fast' or to 'Fail Often'
• We are told that from 'Big' Risks come 'Big' Rewards
• Or that 'If you're not Failing, then you're not Trying'

All of which would indicate that failing, in its many forms, can have a positive impact and may, at times, even be desirable. Certainly when we are talking about the personal growth and development of ourselves, or our people, there is a lot of learning that takes place through failure; through trial and error.  

The dilemma though is that in most organizations failure has consequences. Companies want employees to take risks, because they don't get ahead if you don't, but you'd better not mess anything up when you do! Companies may spout rhetoric around being accepting of failure but systemically not prove supportive.

We want our children to build a life around their strengths and talents, but then studiously avoid letting them know when they lack skill or need improvement.  Instead, we over-emphasize how 'good' they are at something, leaving them with an over-inflated view of their skills. We develop a culture that says it should be enough that they 'want' it or that they 'tried'. The actual outcome of the effort doesn't matter as much as the fact that they made an effort. The concept of failure is foreign because the word itself was avoided.

The conundrum... We are told that failure can be a good thing, but taught to avoid it at all costs.

How then do we build a successful company, a successful life if we don't make allowances for failure? If we don't build in an understanding and acceptance of the lessons that come with failing, then we are doing our children, ourselves and our companies a disservice.  

Failure helps build resiliency.

Failure helps build perseverance.

Failure helps build strength.

Failure helps build success.

The key to making the above statements true, of course, is that you learn from your mistakes. Each failure must teach you something, must result in your modifying your approach to help you reach success. 

 

All great successes are preceded by a series of failures

To help you ensure that you are growing from your failures, ask yourself the following...

• What has this failed attempt taught me?
• What might I try differently as a result?
• What further support, information, skill might I need?

And if you find that you haven't failed at anything recently...

• Is there something I am hesitating trying because I am concerned about the possibility of failing?
• Where might I push my skills even further?
• What new challenges can I set for myself?
• What am I interested in learning?

Regardless of what anyone says, there are winners and losers, successes and failures.  In the end, these are just labels. What's important to remember is not whether you lost or failed, but what you did with that experience. What you learn from it is what will determine what you earn from it. 

Just Try It!

We admonish our children to try new things.  'How do you know you won't like it if you don't try it?'

When did we stop applying the same rule to ourselves? When did our concern over possibly looking foolish, or not proving to be the best at something overshadow our desire to step in and give something a 'go'?

In essence... when did we start giving up before we even began?

We once were courageous.  Everything in life was new to us, but we willingly gave new things a try. Crawling, walking, talking, throwing a ball, skipping a stone, catching a frog. Our childhood is comprised of a series of new experiences, times when we willingly stepped forward and tried something new, all strung together.  Remember the delight you experienced when you tried something for the first time and liked it? When you discovered it was fun? Better yet, when you found something you were good at?

What happened to that?

Not trying is giving up before you start

I have a raft of clients lamenting the fact that they haven't discovered anything they are passionate about in their life, yet they are doing so from the comfort of their couch.  You have to explore new experiences to discover those hidden interests, talents and passions. You need a breadth of experiences to learn what you are truly capable of.

We all have undiscovered talents that are waiting to be uncovered. However, we can't build and capitalize on them if we don't know what they are. It is only by pushing ourselves to try new things that we will uncover what those latent talents are.

Experiencing the new helps us...

• Increase our self confidence
• Gain a greater appreciation of ourselves
• Become a more 'interesting' person - we have far more to share with others
• Discover new talents, strengths and passions!
• Live without regrets

So, in the spirit of parents everywhere, get up, get out and get going.  You'll never know unless you try!

The Cost of Avoiding Change

There is no shortage of articles that will extol the benefits of change such as; increased personal
growth, progress and opportunities. Regardless of the benefits that could be listed though, there are those that opt not to adopt change. Generally, the avoidance of change occurs because the perceived benefits do not outweigh the perceived costs.

However, when taking a look at the cost/benefit ratio, it is important that all true costs be identified. Typically, the assumption is that the cost of 'not' changing is the loss of the perceived potential benefits of the change.  However, the impact of not embracing change is far greater and more insidious.

Although we may be choosing not to embrace changes, preferring to maintain the status quo, it turns out that we may not be factoring in the true costs to us of avoiding the change. Research has shown that the following factors also impact us whenever we avoid change...

• Reduced adaptability.  The more often we avoid change, the less adaptable and flexible we become, which makes us ill-prepared to face new situations in the future.  Think of your ability to deal with and manage change as a muscle.  The more you use it, the stronger it gets. However, the reverse is also true.  The less you use it the weaker the muscle gets which means that you are not likely to have the strength needed to see a future situation through when it is not possible to avoid it.  Continuously avoiding change leaves you with few coping strategies for facing future events.
• Stagnation.  We may be comfortable with our current situation, but that doesn't mean we don't want more or better for ourselves.  However, our failure to embrace change will result in reduced skills, talents and abilities. We can't possibly be capable of fulfilling 'more' in the future if we are unwilling to push ourselves to take on more today.  Our skills become obsolete, significantly limiting future opportunities, until we become redundant and unnecessary. Instead, we need to continuously be upgrading our skills and knowledge, to remain current and viable. 
• Fewer Future Opportunities.  The less we say 'yes' to opportunities today, the less likely we are to say yes to them tomorrow.  Additionally, the less we say yes today, the less others call upon us with opportunities in the future because we have trained them to look elsewhere. If you are not open to exploring new opportunities and challenges today, then don't be surprised that future opportunities pass you by.
• Increased Stress.  Although people will often avoid change because they feel that it is too stressful on them to embrace it, long-term studies find the reverse to be true.  Failing to embrace change leaves you with limited opportunities, reduced income, and more repetitive work which will lead to increased stressors over the longer term. 
• Reduced Self Esteem.  One of the greatest factors in building and renewing our self-esteem is our sense of achievement.  As we push ourselves to take on and try new things we build our confidence and belief in ourselves. By avoiding taking on new tasks we fail to stretch ourselves and provide new examples of our capabilities and talents. Our seeming 'lack of success' then leads us to view ourselves as less successful and less capable which reduces our confidence, completing this downward spiral in our self-belief.  Our self-esteem is built through our successes, however small, which requires us to challenge ourselves with something new periodically.

"I used to say, 'I sure hope things will change.' Then I learned that the only way things are going to change for me is when I change."    Jim Rohn

Change is never easy and not all change is desirable.  There may very well be changes that it is in your best interest to say no to.  However, there are many changes that would prove beneficial to you in the longer term, that would help you grow, build your confidence and open up new opportunities for you.  Understanding the true cost of saying 'no' to these moments will perhaps help you to overcome your hesitation and make the 'yeses' easier to say!

Tip Thursday - Personal Development

We can get caught up in doing so many things that we sometimes lose track of 'why'. To determine the value of what you're doing, whether you should be doing it or even just as a means of freeing up time to do other things, consider whether the activity you are engaged in will make you better. If what you are doing does not serve you in some way; does not improve you, grow you, support you or reward you, ask - Why am I even doing this? If it doesn't make you better - it's likely not worth doing!

Stop Dreaming, Start Scheming

When looking to modify and change behaviours it is not enough to simply identify a bad habit that we want to stop, or to identify a good habit we want to start, we ideally want to link the two. Solely focusing on a bad behaviour we want to stop leaves a void that our brain seeks to fill. Without direction concerning what we would prefer to do, our brain may select a behaviour that proves equally bad at fulfilling our ultimate goals and objectives.

Similarly, merely identifying a behaviour we want to start leaves our brain scrambling to make room for that new behaviour. It will therefore look to eliminate an existing behaviour to clear that room. However, our brain doesn't typically make judgments on 'good' versus 'bad' and may therefore replace an existing good behaviour with your desired new habit, resulting in a break-even proposition before you even get started.

The premise of my last book, Stop This, Start That, was to give you 365 different success tips that highlighted what behaviours to stop engaging in, and what behaviours to replace them with.  Clean and simple.  Although 365 ideas may seem like more than enough to keep you busy for a lifetime, if not the better part of a year, I find that I am often in conversation with clients where additional tips and ideas surface.  This blog post grew from one such conversation.

There are numerous articles, books and videos that direct you to dream as big as possible, to envision everything that you would like to have and attract into your life.  Unfortunately though, they often don't provide further instruction, leaving you with the belief that creating a vision board or replaying a dream over and over is enough to create it as a reality.

I am a firm believer in opening yourself to possibilities and to creating a vision for yourself of where those possibilities can take you, but dreaming on its own is not enough.  A dream without action will lead to disappointment and regret. You can't continue to replay the same dream over and over, without taking any action to make it happen, and expect it to manifest. Dreams need help to come to fruition.

In which case, if you have something that you have longed for, wished for, dreamed for, that has yet to come true for you, it is time to Stop Dreaming and time to Start Scheming.  You need to sit down and develop a plan of action for making that dream a reality.

• What do you need to make this dream happen?  Are there specific skills you need?  Financing? Contacts? Do you need more information, education or direction? 
• Who could you talk to, what book could you read, what course could you take?
• What would be the first step you could take toward turning your dream into a reality?  What's the second, the third, the fourth?
• What obstacles exist preventing you from taking action?  How could you circumvent them?

Dream big, dream deep, dream wide.  But don't get so caught up in the act of dreaming that you overlook the need to start scheming.  All dreams need a plan to become reality.  Start building your plan now to start living your dream.

You Can Figure It Out

Growth of any kind requires us to do things we've never done before.

• That new promotion?  
• That new sport?  
• That new art?  
• That new hobby?  
• That new volunteer experience?
• That new relationship?

New things can be fun, exhilarating and exciting but they can also be scary and intimidating. Often our move forward may be impeded by the thought that we don't know what to do, or perhaps how to do it.

• Antonio has a great idea for a new business he would love to start.  Although excited about the concept he hesitates because he soon realizes that he doesn't know how to arrange for manufacturing, he isn't sure about financing options and definitely don't know how to set up online shopping and marketing systems.  He decides not to pursue his idea because he determines that he doesn't know enough to start a business.  
• Debra has been working in her current role for 4 years and has successes to spare.  She has out performed all of her peers and finds that she knows her current job inside and out.  In fact, she might even be willing to admit that she is feeling a little bored and under-challenged.  A new opportunity has just been posted inside the company that others have said she would be great at.  She's interested, but hesitates to apply because, as she reads over the job description, she realizes that there are aspects of the job that she has never done before.

Although we may tell ourselves that we can't do something because we don't have the skill or knowledge to complete it, recognise that it isn't the lack of knowledge holding you back, but your fear.  In today's world, knowledge and information has never been easier to access.  Need to know something?  Google it.  You will instantly have more leads than you will ever need to follow to find out what you need to know. Someone, somewhere knows what you need to know, knows how to do what you need to do.  Find them and ask them.

All that is needed, in order to move forward is to believe in your ability to figure things out.  Once you have faith in this, that everything is 'figure-outable', then the phrase 'I don't know' is no longer an end to your dream or growth, but a place to start.

• You don't know how to set up a new business, how to arrange for manufacturing, what it takes to get financing?  Start searching and start asking.  There are lots of people that have done what you are looking to do that would be more than happy to share some of their life lessons with you. There's entrepreneurial training, associations with support systems in place, business coaches, podcasts...  
• You aren't sure if you have what it takes to be hired into a new role?  Apply and find out. Don't second-guess it.  The worst that can happen is that you find out what you are missing and then eliminate the gap.  The best thing?  You get the job!

Figuring out what to do may prove not to be the biggest barrier.  Finding the courage to step up and take the necessary action may be it.  It is never enough to ask the questions, to seek the answers, if you don't activate them.  True clarity comes through action, for it is out of 'doing' that you truly learn and grow.

If you wait to begin until you know everything you may need, then you will remain sitting on the couch. Just start, by believing in your ability to figure things out as you go.

Tip Thursday - Focus

Consider that the need to Focus in on one thing is not dependent upon your simply saying YES to that responsibility. To successfully focus on one opportunity requires you to say NO to all of the other opportunities and ideas that cross your plate.

Dividing your focus is likely to divide your results. Put your energies and attention where they are best able to give you the results you desire most, putting the rest on 'hold' until then.

Expand Your Universe

If you have ever tried to grow an indoor plant, you likely came to realize that the size of the plant would often be determined by the size of the pot or container it is planted in.  When small, the plant thrives better if the container is not overly large. However, as the plant grows and matures, that same sized pot becomes restrictive and can stunt its growth, requiring that the plant be re-potted into something larger, allowing it more room to facilitate growth.

We are not all that dissimilar.  The smaller our personal Universe, the less space we have to grow. Though the size of our universe may have 'fit' and suited us when we were first starting out, we need to continually be expanding the space around us to provide us with the stimulation and room needed to grow and expand.

Grow your Universe to allow for Personal Growth

Expanding the size of our Personal Universe need not be difficult or arduous, but it does require that we remain open to constant exploration and learning.  Just as the Star Trek Enterprise expanded the size of the known Universe by 'seeking out new life and new civilizations', you too need to give yourself room to grow by continually expanding the environment you have to grow into.

The following are some great tips for helping you to give yourself some room to grow.  There is only growth or stagnation. If you want to keep on earning, you have to keep on learning.  There is no other or better way.

1. Travel.  As much as you can, to as many places as you can.  See places for yourself. Meet the people.  Learn how they live.  Don't allow other people's interpretations to shape your impressions, experience it first hand.  
2. Read.  There is no excuse for not expanding your mind, knowledge or understanding by not picking up a book.  Even if it's only for 10 minutes a day - Read!  There are free resources everywhere so cost is not an issue on this one!  Everything you read is an investment you make to your Brain Trust so don't shortchange yourself.
3. Do something new.  Pick a new sport, a new activity, a hobby.  Give it a try.  You don't have to stick with it, you don't have to perfect it... just try it.  Experience it for yourself.  You will never uncover new interests, strengths or talents without trying something new.  
4. Take a class.  Explore a new subject or skill by taking a class in it.  You can sign up at a local school or college or you can take advantage of free online resources.  MIT has open course ware now as do other great schools. Formal learning and education has never been so accessible.  
5. Podcasts.  Listen to some podcasts on subjects that you know little about.  Gain some insight into new research, follow discussions on topics outside of your field, try a new interest on for size. Listen to what others are thinking and doing to stimulate your thoughts and actions.
6. Ask Questions.  Develop your curiosity by asking more questions and seeking out answers. Don't hesitate to ask questions of others, to google questions that pop to your mind... you'll never get answers if you don't seek them out and questions are one of the easiest, fastest and best ways.
7. Online Videos.  The internet is such a great resource available at your fingertips, eliminating excuses for not having access to information or tools.  TED is a phenomenal source of talks on a wide range of topics, many of which you may never have thought about but that open your mind to new avenues of thought, science, activity and research.  Whether you have 5 minutes or 15, TED has something to share.  Don't underestimate the value of YouTube as a resource, it has more to share than simply videos of cats jumping in boxes, or check out Instructables if you are looking to learn how to do things yourself - many new skills just waiting for you there.  

You can Expand your Universe with only 5 minutes a day.  The main point is to expand it, even in small ways.  Just as a plant's growth becomes stunted in a too small pot, so too does your growth become limited if you are trying to grow in too small a space.  Make a change, do something different, pick up something new...  it all adds not only to the size of your Universe and your potential growth, but to the quality of the life you experience along the way.

When Push Comes to Shove

Who are you... when push comes to shove?

What are you capable of?

... Why wait until then?

We are far more capable of far more things than we are living.  Usually it is our own limiting beliefs about ourselves that create the restrictions keeping us from doing and being what we can. However, it is in difficult moments, when we are forced to take actions that move us beyond these limiting beliefs, that we gain insight into our true potential. 

... Why wait until then?

Why wait until we are forced into taking action?  Why not step into our potential now?

Think of all you could be doing, think of all you could be feeling, think of all you could be living... if you embraced all you were capable of... now.

Our fears and limiting beliefs prevent us from taking the steps in self discovery that are required for us to move into all we can be.  Those steps aren't always easy, which is why it often requires a personal challenge to provide the push and the shove to get us moving.  Even then, some will dig in their heels, steadfastly refusing to release what they know to embrace the inevitable change that growth requires.

Many harbour too many self-doubts to let-go and move forward, choosing instead to believe the "I-don`ts" and "Ì`m not`s". Too many of us have a loud and strong inner voice that doesn't hesitate to share what we are not, drowning out the voice that is trying to share all that we are.  When faced with situations that pressure us to take action, we rise above the I-can`ts by lending our inner champion a microphone, allowing its chants of I-am, I-can, I-will to to lead us forward.  For that situation, that moment - we become.  

If you can do it and be it then... you can do it and be it all of the time.  Why wait for a crisis to be all that you can, to step forward into yourself?  What life would you be living today if you stepped into all you could be? 

Who are you... when push comes to shove?

What are you capable of?

Why wait?

How Big is Your Bucket?

We have grown up in a culture that chases ‘bigger’.  We don’t just up-size, we super-size.  We use bigger houses to define our success, think restaurants with overloaded plates are ‘better’, believe the bigger the diamond the greater the love, and we think that we don’t just need to fill the shoes of those that walked before us but we need to leave a bigger footprint. 

Everything that we do tends to expand to fill the size of the bucket that we set out in front of us.  Whether we are socialized or hard-wired into believing it, we tend to fall into the belief that our life goal is to fill the bucket.  Knowing this then becomes an important component of any development plan we create, whether for others or for ourselves.  Consider the following two scenarios...

1. People that are perpetually dissatisfied with their lives.  No matter how much they seem to have, it is just never enough.  
2. People that are happy and satisfied with their lives, even though it may not appear that they have much to be happy about

You likely know someone from each of these scenarios and, it`s equally likely that you fall into one of these descriptions.  Now consider that the only element that is differentiating people from description one or two is... the size of their bucket!

Those that are perpetually dissatisfied with their lives are constantly trying to fill a super-sized bucket. It may be so large that they couldn't possibly fill it in a lifetime.  The bucket they set out in front of themselves has pre-determined their dissatisfaction.  No matter how much they attain and achieve, the bucket continues to have room for `more`.  Additionally, because there is constantly room in the bucket they are unable to celebrate the successes they have achieved because they are quickly swallowed up in the need for `more`.

Instead, those that have placed in front of them a smaller bucket, find it easier to fill.  They can be satisfied with what they have in their lives because their bucket is full.  A partially full bucket is not demoralizing because filling it seems achievable.  

When a bucket is filled it can simply be shifted to one side and new bucket set out in front.  Think of this visual because it is important.  You may have a new, empty bucket in front of you but, at any time, you can glance to the side and see all of the full buckets you have lined up over the course of your lifetime.  Your achievements are readily and easily viewed, continuing to instill a sense of accomplishment and satisfaction.  Therefore, you can continue to strive and to grow, filling new buckets as you do, without ever experiencing the frustration of attempting to fill a `too large` bucket. That over-sized bucket will begin to feel impossible to fill, as though there is a hole in the bottom that prevents you from ever succeeding. 

`There`s a hole in my bucket Dear Liza, Dear Liza, There`s a hole in my bucket Dear Liza, a hole`

We want to be motivated by the concept of more, but we don`t want it to seem unachievable. That is demoralizing and will rob us of the energy or drive to succeed. Instead, be strategic about the size of the bucket you set before you.  Large enough that it requires a little work and effort to fill, not so large that it would take an entire lifetime.  There is no virtual bucket shortage out there.  There is not limit on the storage space available for all of the buckets you fill.

If you happen to be one of those with a too-large bucket set before you then the task before you is clear.  Get yourself a mess of smaller buckets and start emptying your big bucket into it.  Spend some time thinking about everything that is currently in that big bucket, all of your past accomplishments and achievements, every hurdle you have jumped, every barrier you have overcome.  Shift them into smaller buckets and line them up.  When your big bucket is empty, toss it and look out over all of the buckets you have filled, everything you have achieved thus far.  Embrace it, revel in it and then... place a new, smaller bucket in front of you and start filling it.

It`s not the number or size of your accomplishments that makes for a happy and contented life, but the size of your bucket you`re putting them in!

 

Changing Your Story - With Two Little Words

When it comes to story-telling, there is much that we can learn from children.  As adults, as soon as a story starts we are already anticipating the end.  Movies and books end.  The credits role, the final page gets turned.  As a result, we tend to think the same of the stories we tell ourselves. 

When we view our life we tend to look at it as a series of stories, each with its own ending.  Strung together those stories comprise the life we have lived and experienced.  However, in viewing our life as a series of stories, each with its own unique ending, we have formed each story as a complete entity unto itself.  We are therefore not in a position to ‘alter’ that story in any way.  The impact of this is that we then leave ourselves helpless in the face of the story.  We are powerless to strengthen the impact of a positive story or to lessen that of a negative one.

Children though offer us a unique perspective.  When telling stories they always want the story to continue.  They start off with a specific story and plot line and when that story has run its course for them, whether in two sentences or twenty, they shift gears with the magical phrase… And Then.  Those two little words allow them to string together two disparate thoughts, to switch gears and shift perspectives. 

With the use of ‘and then’ they are clearly communicating that this one thing happened… and then… this happened!  'And Then' serves to form a continuation, each story a continuation of the one before, forming a seemingly never-ending, interconnected chain.  The story didn’t end. Life didn’t end with the completion of that one story, it continues, it changes, it grows.

Imagine what the impact would be to the stories you tell yourself about you, if you began introducing ‘and then’ to the story line.  Your old negative stories would no longer define you because no longer would your story end with that moment.  Instead, you would acknowledge and own the story but follow it up with ‘and then’. 

·         And then… she decided that she deserved better and ended that relationship in search of better

·         And then… he discovered he was more talented than he had initially thought, opening up the business he had always dreamed of

·         And then… she determined to show them all just how strong a woman could be

·         And then… he put the bottle aside, stood up and stepped into the new life waiting for him

The past will always have an impact upon us.  Our experiences are there to shape us though, not define us.  They need not hold us back and prevent us from living the life we want and deserve.  

From pain can come an appreciation of joy.  From being beaten down by life can come the strength to overcome adversity.  You aren’t defined by the event, you are defined by the story you are telling.  If your past stories no longer serve you don’t allow them to continue to direct your future.  Define what’s next.

Tell your story, pause and think…  And Then?  

Productivity Lessons from your Kids

We are typically so focused on teaching our children what they need to know to be successful that we fail to recognise just how much they have to teach us. When it comes to productivity there is much we can learn from them. As children we are far more productive in learning new information and skills than we are as adults. Stepping back and stepping out of our 'Adult' mindset can help us to relearn a couple of key skills that we may have left behind in our childhood that just might serve us well as adults.

Get the Sleep you Need

Kids sleep.  A lot.  When they are awake they give whatever they are doing everything they've got, which means they sleep when they need it.  Without enough sleep they are unfocused and irritable. What parent among us has not experienced that! However, without enough sleep we are the same. But, we lie to ourselves ab out it, saying we're fine, that we don't need any more sleep to operate. Research shows us though that a lack of sleep can impair our abilities as much as too much alcohol can. Without enough sleep we lose focus, our memory suffers and our attitude shifts to negative. To be more productive you need to make getting the sleep you need a priority.

Trial and Error

Kids learn by doing. They keep on trying something until they get it. They are even willing to take a few risks along the way, make a few mistakes, take a few bumps and bruises in order to improve and achieve their goal.  Just watch a young child learning to walk, letting go of the coffee table as they step toward the couch.  The pride when they make it and the determination to try again when they miss.

Trying something again and again helps them to perfect the skill.  This is how we learned to walk, to eat, to talk, to ride a bike...  It still works for us today, we just have to hold our pride in check and allow ourselves a few missteps along the way!

Keep the Routines

If you've raised a child you know how essential it is to build some solid routines into their day. These routines are their safe-zones, leaving them able to deal with the other changing elements in their day. The structure gives them the security they need to explore fully all of the 'new' experiences they are faced with.

We are much the same.  Without some solid routines, and the habits they build, life is likely to feels constantly changing and perpetually overwhelming.  We want to focus our mental and physical energies into dealing with the 'new' issues we face, in building 'new' skills, not in constantly solving old ones.  Strong routines manage the 'old' so we have what is needed to take on the 'new'.

Focus on 1 Thing

Kids are remarkable in their focus and concentration.  It may not be for tremendously long duration, but when they are engaged in something they tend to give it all that they've got. They are living fully in that moment, attending fully to it.

We, on the other hand, divide our energies amongst multiple tasks, trying to attend to too many things at once. this tends to decrease our effectiveness and productivity, not increase it.  The better able we are to focus on one task at a time, the faster we will actually get it done.

Know When to Stop

Kids can go, go, go... and then they collapse.  They are interested in an activity... until they are not. And the distinction is clear. They know when they are done, when they have had enough, when they have lost interest and need a change or a break.

We, however, have learned not to listen to the inner voice recommending a break or change in activity, choosing instead to push on through.  However, our productivity markedly decreases when we do. When we feel our attention waning we do far better to take a small break or to switch tasks, each of which allows our brains to focus on something different. Switching it up helps refresh our brains, to keep our focus and attention up, which is a huge boost in our productivity.

If you've ever wished that you could be a kid again... here's your chance to introduce a few childlike qualities into your day, helping you to be more productive.  The bonus is, of course, that getting your work done faster allows you a lot more time to go out and play.  Recess anyone?

Are you Standing In your Story or On it?

Martin has been running his own small home renovations company, on weekends, for the past 5 years.  'I was never any good at math in school.  To be successful in running a business you need to be good at math.  I could never handle that'.  He is finding that demand for his services is far exceeding his ability to deliver, which means he is turning down work.  He would love to make the home-renovations business his full-time occupation but hesitates because...

Sandra struggles to make ends meet.  No matter what she does to try and bring in additional income she never seems to end up with 'more' at the end of the month. She would like to begin to save for her retirement, save for a home of her own or take a vacation trip but can't see her way clear to ever making any of those things happen.  She says... 'I never seem to get ahead.  Even with taking on a part-time job I have more days left than money at the end of each month.  My mother was never good with money, I guess I take after her.'

We all have stories that we tell ourselves, serving as explanations as to 'why' we made the choices we did, 'why' our lives are what they are, 'why' we turned out the way we did.  These stories become our explanations for 'Not'.  Not being what we want, not having what we want, not doing what we want, not achieving what we want.  However, it is the stories that we tell ourselves about our lives that are often our biggest saboteurs to the achievements and success that we seek.

The stories we tell ourselves are simply our version of the facts, making them only one version. However, we hold them as truths, making them an unchangeable constant in our lives.  In doing so they serve to direct and control the actions we are willing, or unwilling, to take. When we allow our story to be our master, to allow our story to direct and control the direction of our lives, we are effectively standing IN our story. When we are standing in our story it becomes the reason why we can't do something, why we can't achieve something.  We get caught up in the cyclical loop of the story and fail to see options for different endings.

Instead, we need to learn to stand ON our story, to use it to propel us forward.  Our story then becomes our platform for change rather than an anchor holding us in place.  When we stand on our story we make it our 'why', allowing it to become the wind that propels us forward. Every story about someone overcoming the odds, every rags to riches story, every example of someone overcoming a disability is an example of someone that chose not to stand IN their story, but to stand ON it.

Stand ON your story, not IN it

Martin broke out of his 'I'm not good enough at math to run a full-time business' story by sitting down and acknowledging that he had been doing just that for the past five years.  He had been successful at handling all of the materials calculations for each project, had been successful in estimating actual project costs to provide customer quotes, had been successful in handling the mathematical calculations necessary to measure and build structurally sound additions.  Although he acknowledged that growing larger he would want to hire a bookkeeper to oversee the day-to-day management of expenses he came to acknowledge that was more a sound business decision than it was a reflection of his shortcomings.

Sandra came to realize that her adoption of the story that she was not good with money came from an ongoing story from her childhood, one that her father shared with her and her mother consistently - that 'women' are no good at handling money.  This was a fairy tale from her early years that she had incorporated into being the story of her life.  It was when she began to challenge this story, and rewrite it, that she found she was far better at managing her funds than she had presumed. Additionally, she found that in rewriting the story that she was no good with money, she opened up new opportunities for herself to make even more.

If you, like Martin and Sandra, find that standing in your story doesn't suit you any more, that you want to stand on your story and experience more in your life, follow these steps to help you move up and onto your stories.

Acknowledge there is a problem/issue

You likely already have a sense of some of the stories you're standing in that are holding you back, but also pay attention to the times you tell yourself - I'm not..., I can't..., I don't....    These phrases likely precede a story and are clearly dis-empowering ones.

Write down your story

Take the time to write down everything you can about your story.  What is its script, where might you have heard it or told it first?  If it has history spend a little time to uncover it.  Sandra's story above clearly had some history that, once she knew it, allowed her to recognise that it was her father's story and need not be hers.  She broke through faster than she might have otherwise by spending a little more time upfront thinking it through.

What does the story mean?

Write down everything that standing in your story means.  In essence you are writing - Because I believe THIS story, I...  What are the things you do as a result of standing in this story?  What are the things you don't do?  Think of the behaviours you engage in, and don't engage in, as a result of standing in this story.  Understanding how it plays out on a daily basis helps us to understand what needs to change.

What are alternative stories?

In order to learn to stand on your story, rather than in it, you need to be able to envision 'different' for yourself.  Brainstorm a few for yourself, opening yourself new possibilities and new ways of thinking and being.

Pick one

Of the new stories you crafted, which is the most desirable?  Consider, If this was true then...  If this story you crafted was your story, what would life look like?  What would the results be?  How would you treat yourself, treat others?  How would you behave?  What actions would you take?

Take a Step

In order to Stand On Your Story you need to use it as a springboard to something else.  Rather than letting it hold us back we want to use it as the fuel to moving forward.  However, all of the planning in the world doesn't take us from where we are if we don't act upon those plans.  Any step, no matter how small, will begin to lift you out of the story you're in, allowing you stand on it and move into a newer, better story.  And... no matter how great that story may be in comparison, if you want to continue to grow you will need to let go of that story to move forward to the next.

When we are busy standing in our story we create a host of reasons around 'why' we can't be or have or do what we want with our lives, which holds us back from uncovering our true potential and worth. The longer we allow that story to live, the more cemented it becomes in our psyche, becoming a truth we take for granted, embedding itself into our very perceptions of ourselves and the world around us. However, when we learn to stand on our stories we stop allowing them to define us. We enter into the possibility of 'more'.  When you do, you help to liberate others to do the same.

Unwrapping Your Gifts!

We all have our own special and unique gifts; talents and skills that we excel at.  Yes... everyone, including you!  The issue is not whether we have strengths or not, but whether we know and understand what they are.  It is pretty difficult to utilize our strengths fully if we are still struggling to understand what they are.

Unfortunately, many of our experiences in life have taught us to focus on our weaknesses, on what we typically end up labeling as our shortcomings.  In grade school we had those big red circles highlighting those shortcomings.  Our parents likely spent far more time focusing on how to pull up our grades than they did on how to build on the areas that we excelled at and our workplace managers tend to do exactly the same.  However, it is important to recognise that our performance over a range of skills will always vary.  We have some activities that we will be better at than others.  In the picture below, these are the 'above the line activities', those areas in which we tend to exceed expectations.

We will also always have some areas in which we fall short.  Always.  We cannot be good at everything, nor should we expect or try to. Unfortunately, our parents and bosses have trained us to agonize over the below the line results.  We put our focus, energy and even money into improving those skills.  However, for most of them, the best we can hope to do is to raise our skill level to the meets expectations line.  For the most part this is fine.  There are many areas in our work and our lives where being and doing 'good-enough' is, in fact, good enough!  We know that there is a law of diminishing returns telling us that additional effort is not going to net us the equivalent in return, in which case that additional effort could be put to better use elsewhere.

However, there is a far larger problem.  If we are focusing all of our efforts on improving the below the line skills, and not focusing on the above the lines skills at all, then we are creating a system of mediocrity.  We get what we focus on.  If we only focus on pulling our weaknesses up, and not on growing or developing our strengths, then our talents fall down to meet that middle red line, even while our weaknesses grow.  However, in the end, we are simply meeting expectations.  This does nothing to inspire or motivate us, and is therefore the problem with many corporate performance management programs.

If you are looking to advance your career, or to build your business, then uncovering and leveraging your strengths is the single most important thing you can do.  

It is through our unique gifts, our talents and strengths, that we add the most value.  These are the skills that set us apart from the crowd.  The good news is that we are most satisfied and energized when we engage in work that utilizes our key talents and strengths.  This is when we do our best work, this is when we truly shine.

The little stumbling block in all of this of course, rests in uncovering just what your true gifts are.  If you catch yourself denying you have any or are at a bit of a loss in identifying them clearly enough to build some career strategies around them, then follow some of the suggestions below to help you to discover your strengths.

Take an Assessment

There are numerous online tools that you can use to help you to uncover your strengths, the most popular of which is Strengths Finder.  You can take their short version for free or pay a nominal fee to take the extended version for greater insights.  If you buy their book (See below for link) then you get a link to take the full assessment for free.  If you decide for some unbiased insight then these tools can be useful but don't take them as gospel.  Use the results as a starting point of your exploration and couple them with some of the suggestions below to gain greater clarity.

Follow the Feeling

Learn to pay attention to how you are feeling over the course of your day.  When we are using our gifts we will experience greater levels of energy and engagement, a sense of Flow or a feeling of being in the Zone.  Time will move more quickly during these moments and we are more likely to derive feelings of satisfaction, excitement, interest and pride from activities utilizing our strengths.  In general use the following to help you to uncover insights into your strengths and weaknesses.

• Strengths - are energy boosters
• Weaknesses - are energy drainers

Experiment

Sometimes, to uncover our gifts, we need to get out and try new things.  We often have undiscovered strengths, only because we have not explored our abilities fully.  Experiment a little.  Follow an interest or a passion.  Dabble in something new, explore opportunities you may have given a pass on - all with an eye to discovering new abilities and talents.

What's Different?

Pay attention to what you do differently than everyone else.  When we meet expectations, or operate below the line, we are usually just following the direction of those around us.  However, when we are playing to our strengths we feel more empowered and confident, often stepping off onto our own little path.  Looking for your areas of difference, in thinking or approach, can often highlight a talent or gift you have overlooked.

Others Know

Gain some insight from those around you.  Consider what others typically seek you out for.  What help and advice do your co-workers look to you for?  Often, those around us recognise our talents long before we do and will ask us for help in those areas, knowing we do it better than they ever could.  However, because our true gifts may feel so natural and comfortable to us, we may downplay their value and fail to recognise that those skills don't come as readily to others.  Others know the value - use their insight to build your recognition of the value.

• Exercise.  Get others in your life to share a story with you - a story about when they thought you were are your 'best'.  As you gather the different stories, review them looking for common themes and threads that indicate your strengths.  

Of course, once you have identified your gifts and strengths, you need to develop an action plan on how to build and leverage them.  Volunteer for activities that use your gifts, build a career path that utilizes and grows them, even offer support to others in the areas of your talents. All will help you to capitalize on your gifts in ways that help highlight the tremendous value you represent.  For additional help with your strategies you can check out Marcus Buckingham's book on putting your strengths to work (see below). 

You represent a unique blend of skills and talents that no one else has. Unwrapping your gifts allows you to offer the world the best you have and are. Focus on your above-the-line skills.   Above-the-line is above average.  Above-the-line is about meeting your expectations not theirs, and above-the-line is above what most others are offering, leaving you standing head and shoulders above those around you.

Great view from up there!


Book Links:

5 Steps to Building your Self Confidence

Perhaps one of the most common requests that I receive from my coaching clients is for guidance on how to feel more Confident. Perhaps one of the most highly prized, and envied, characteristics of leaders is their confidence, that ease and belief they have in their ability to make things happen.

We know also that highly confident people tend to: get promoted more and faster, be seen as more attractive, make more money, be seen as charismatic, be remembered longer, be viewed as more decisive, smarter, and even taller.  In fact, the list is far longer than this but it all stems from the projection of confidence.

This is all well and good for those that possess confidence, that belief in their ability to perform, but what about those of us that could do with a little more of this quality?  That struggle to find it in ourselves to believe in ourselves?

The good news is that confidence is not something that you are simply born with, it is something that you can develop and grow.  To start it is helpful to have a clear idea of who you are, gaining a clear picture of what your current strengths and abilities and even weaknesses are.  You need to have a clear perspective of what you currently bring to the table, in order to know what to work on and what to promote.

If you need to gain a better perspective on this, complete the following exercise.  Divide a piece of paper into three columns and label them Strengths, Weaknesses, Accomplishments.

1. Strengths.  You want to understand the Strengths you possess because these are the areas that you are most likely going to want to promote to others and perhaps build your expertise around. 
2. Weaknesses.   I deliberately label the second column Weaknesses and not Developmental Needs because you don't want to waste time in developing weaknesses that aren't needed by your current job or that you do not possess an interest in.  You can't be good at everything so don't waste time that could be spent creating excellence in a strength just to create mediocrity out of an unnecessary weakness.  
3. Accomplishments.  The third column requires you to compile a list of your Accomplishments to date.  Large or small you have them.  Don't stop until you have listed at least 20. Any obstacle you have overcome in life is an accomplishment.  Anything you did that you felt a sense of pride in doing or attempting is an accomplishment.  If you struggle with completing any of your columns then consider enlisting the aid of a few close friends.  Ask them to complete the form for you, using their responses to help you gain some perspective on strengths and accomplishments that you are failing to recognise and give yourself credit for.  

Many find that just completing the exercise above helps them to already feel more confident about themselves and what they offer.  It is sometimes far too easy to lose sight of everything that we have accomplished, everything we do possess strength in when we are only focused on what we lack.  We are all a constant mix of strengths and weaknesses, successes and failures.  It is important to always be looking at the full picture and not just a portion.  As good a starting point as this is though, I offer the following 5 tips for helping you to continue to gain and strengthen your confidence.

• Focus on Learning and Improving.  Developing our skills and knowledge about something can increase our confidence and belief in our abilities in that area.  Often our lack of confidence stems from our belief that we don't know enough or that we lack the necessary skill. Use your understanding of your strengths to build your skills and talents.  We can't be great at everything, but we can all be great at something.  Pick your area and focus on strengthen your skills in that area.  

• Don't aim for Perfect.  Making mistakes is normal.  Use them as an opportunity to learn. Not leaving any mental room for the possibility of mistakes can undermine our confidence, feeding into the belief that we can't do it.  Instead, expect mistakes, learn from them and move on.  

"A person, who never made a mistake, never tried anything new"    Albert Einstein

• Start Small.  It is the act of doing and accomplishing things that builds our confidence to do more and other in future.  Even small steps have a positive impact.  Take action, get it done and build positive proof of your ability.  Doing things builds your confidence, worrying about doing them builds your fear.  Take action.

 "Nothing builds self-esteem and self-confidence like accomplishment"  Thomas Carlyle

•  Do Your Homework.  There is no substitute for preparation.  The more prepared you are for something, the more confident you will be in your ability to achieve it.  Don't focus on how much better prepared you 'wish' you were, focus on being as prepared as time and circumstances allow.  Preparation, of however much, is always better than none.

• Keep a Success Log.  As you likely discovered, trying to recall our accomplishments can be a difficult task.  Far better to maintain an ongoing Success Log, in which you continuously record your victories, both large and small, as they occur.  As we continue to focus forward, on all we want to accomplish, it can become far too easy for us to lose sight of all of the successes that got us to this point, or to minimize their value and import.  Recording them as they occur will help to remind you of everything you overcame to get to where you are, helping you to minimize any doubts you may have about your abilities to overcome barriers in the future.

Our confidence is not static, it rises and falls in the face of different situations and their perceived level of challenge.  Use the above exercises and tips to help you to gain the level of confidence you need to face those challenges head-on, to become all that your meant and deserve to be.  I know that there is greatness in you and have every confidence in your uncovering it for yourself.  

7 Tips for your Personal Evolution

Evolution:  the gradual development of something, especially from a simple to a more complex

form.

Evolution is not simply a theory but an active force, one that has been actively present in shaping your life since birth.  As children we embraced this evolutionary force.  It helped us to learn and to grow; to crawl and then walk, to speak, to write and to read, to ride a bike and drive a car, to play ball, to paint, to add and subtract, to swim, to ski and to sing.

When we were younger we evolved rapidly and continuously.  We were almost like sponges, soaking up new experiences, experimenting and trying new things, simply to learn something new.  This rate of evolution slowed down as we aged though, as we began creating boundaries for ourselves, restrictions and limitations on 'who' we thought we were or could be, until our growth and evolution did not become a constant but an exception.  It became ruled by choice, and so many of us, as we age, begin to choose not to grow or evolve further.

I understand that this wasn't always a conscious choice, that no one explained to us that giving in to our negative beliefs and our fears meant that we stopped evolving, that we stunted our growth, but it happened none the less.  Additionally, few of us were ever told that the more we gave in to our fears and held ourselves back from evolving further, the more we would begin devolving, becoming less.

We were all born to be 'more' though.  When young you weren't satisfied with who you were, what you knew and what you could do.  You continued to push, to learn more, to do more, to try more.  When did that slow down or stop for you?  Why?  Are you done?  Have you evolved to be the best 'you' possible?  Is there nothing left for you to discover about yourself, to learn or experience?

We are built with an infinite capacity to evolve.  We can continue to learn new things, to experience new things, to develop new skills, to uncover hidden talents until our last breath.  Why then do so many of us 'settle' along the way?  At what point did you decide that you were 'enough'?  Often it wasn't even a conscious choice. We maybe took a break, sat back and got a little too comfortable, complacency stealing over us like a warm blanket we became reluctant to kick off.

You can choose to take notice though, to remove the blanket of complacency and to begin actively making choices that jump start your evolutionary path.  Use the following suggestions to help you continue your evolutionary journey...

1. Surround yourself with new ideas.   This may mean speaking with people unlike yourself, or reading a book or journal outside your current area of expertise.  You never know what you are likely to think about something until you put yourself into the position of needing to think about it!
2. Recycle your beliefs about... you!  It is often our beliefs about ourselves, who we are, what we can do or what we should do, that create limitations to our growth.  Question old beliefs to uncover new ones.  You are far more capable than you likely give yourself credit for.
3. Try things on, see what fits.  Things we may dismiss out of hand may be a better fit for us than we thought, but we won't know unless we give it a try first.  Nobody expects to 'like' raw fish, but you have to try Sushi to know for sure.  Taste it, try it, take it for a spin. The old adage 'nothing ventured, nothing gained' is your mantra here.
4. Resist Resistance.  Still the little voice inside your head that is telling you No, that is scrambling to pull the Complacency blanket back over your head.  Expect resistance.  Embrace it and lead it forward with you, helping it learn that there's no point in resisting what you're going to do anyway.
5. Focus on Learning, not Teaching.  Teaching is great, but if all of your energy goes to teaching then your focus is solely on 'what you know'.  Learning is all about discovering 'what you don't know'.  Learning leads to your growth, teaching leads to someone else's.  
6. Feed your Curiosity.  One of the greatest sources of learning is our curiosity.  The more that you feed yours, rather than stifle it, the more you create a learning mindset.  Have a question about how something works?  Seek out the answer.  It doesn't matter whether it leads you to something that enhances your job prospects or not.  Train your brain to realize that it is all right, once again, to ask questions, to admit to not knowing something and to seek answers.
7.  Choose a goal bigger than you are.  If the goals you set for yourself are all within your current level of capability then you are not required to stretch or to grow.  Choose a goal that is larger than yourself to push you to learn, grow and evolve further.  

Constant evolution should be the goal that we all strive for, to be constantly pushing ourselves to be more, to know more, to do more.  With this mindset it means that our choice is not to 'Evolve OR die trying' but instead to 'Evolve AND die trying'.  We should all end our lives with the same curiosity and dedication to growth that we entered the world with.  

The key to having, being and doing more...

I have been spending this long weekend landscaping the yard of our new house.  This has meant we have
been busy building new fencing, digging new garden beds, planting trees, shrubs and flowering plants, creating the layout for the new patio still to be laid.  A lot of work but... all permanent changes that enhance the usability of the backyard and enhance the value of the home.  All in all...  a good investment.

It got me wondering about many of my clients though.  How much time do they invest in themselves, in enhancing their marketability?  In today's workplace, if you aren't learning then you aren't increasing your earning power.  You will, at best, stay where you are but, more likely, fall behind those willing to do what it takes to get ahead.

I often hear from clients that there just aren't enough hours in the day or week to be able to spend time on developing themselves, whether working out their brain or their bodies.  I simply don't understand how you can afford not to.  My frustration certainly increases when these self-same people have little difficulty in finding the time to keep up with the plot of their favourite television shows.  I don't have anything against you kicking back and enjoying your favourite show, but don't lose hours a day to the television and then lament your lack of time.  The time you spend in front of the television is your current investment in yourself.  How serious are you about developing your skills, getting ahead and earning more?

I understand that you might work for an organization that does not invest in the training and development of its employees.  Budgets are tight all over.  However, you should care about you enough to make an investment in you.  You might not have the ability to take time off work to attend a training program, or the money to pay for it yourself, but you can afford a book and you can certainly afford a library card to go and borrow one.

You want to be more successful?  Read.
You want to make more money?  Read.

The solution is simple.  To have more, to be more, to do more... Read more.

The easiest way to get better at anything is to emulate those already doing it.  Many of them are generous enough to put their path down on paper, to help guide those that are willing to learn to follow.  Read those books.  Follow their steps.

Here's my challenge. Set a goal to read a little every day, to read one book a month.  One business/career enhancing book a month!  As you read you are looking for that one insight, that one AHA nugget of information that you can apply to your life, your job, that gives you a 1% advantage over those around you that have not read or learned this truth.  At the end of the year those nuggets add up to give you a serious competitive advantage over those around you not investing in themselves.

I have no shortage of books that have opened me to new ideas and concepts, that have introduced me to new ways of thinking and seeing the world, that have helped me to learn from someone else's mistakes so that I didn't need to repeat them, that have shifted me in profound ways to being more than I was before opening its pages.  I want this for you.  You need to want it for you.

1 book a month.   Your competitive advantage.

To help get you started, here are my most recent book purchases that I am convinced will be great reads for you, giving you more than a nugget of information and truth to follow...

Investing in... You!

If you want to be wealthy and happy, learn this lesson well:  Learn to work harder on yourself than you do on your job.      Jim Rohn

Many people in business make the mistake of believing that the company will take care of their development.   After all, it's part of that yearly 'plan', part of the 'review' process isn't it?  Consider though, whose best interests does the organization truly have in mind?  Are they looking to your growth or their needs?  Don't think for a second that they are always synonymous.  Consider also the commitment the company has to your growth when training budgets are being cut or what happens to your development when the money has been spent. That's it for you for the year? No more learning?

Don't leave your growth and development in the hands of someone who in no way could possibly care about you and your future the way that you should.  All too often I have clients who say that they aren't personally going to pay for a course because that's the company's responsibility.  If 'they' aren't paying for it then 'they' aren't going to benefit from it.  But who really benefits?  Warren Buffet puts it this way...

Generally speaking, investing in yourself is the best thing you can do.  Anything that improves your own talents; nobody can tax it or take it away from you.  They can run up huge deficits and the dollar can become worth far less.  You can have all kinds of things happen.  But if you've got talent yourself, and you've maximized your talent, you've got a tremendous asset that can return ten-fold.

Investing in yourself is the single most important investment that you can make in your lifetime.  If you want to have 'more' in your life than you currently have, in any facet of your life, you have to become more than you currently are.  We shouldn't consider that we are students only when at school.  Life is the biggest school that there is and we are therefore all students as long as we continue to breathel.  Start living your life as a student, become that life-long learner.

Focusing on your development means that you are constantly evolving and creating opportunities for yourself.  Many of those opportunities are ones that you likely wouldn't have envisioned for yourself previously because you didn't 'know' what was possible.  Uncover your possibilities by using some of the following suggestions to contribute to your growth.

• Take a course.  On line, in person... it doesn't matter.  What's something that you have always been interested in?  Go out and take a course in it, learn about it.  There are tons of free courses offered by many universities, even MIT offers free open courseware.  How cool would it be to take a course from MIT?
• Read a book.  You want to play with the big-wigs around the senior table?  Read what they are reading.  Learn the latest buzz words and theories.  Bring something new to the table by getting a jump start on something still in their 'to be read' pile!  Look for new ideas that could be applied to your area. I typically have 3 books on the go at once and am never without at least one in my briefcase (more if I have my ipad with me!).  If I find myself with downtime because a client is running late I spend time with a book rather than checking on the latest facebook post.  
• Follow blogs.     Many subject matter experts are writing regular blogs where you can follow some of their latest thoughts.  Consider subscribing to their feeds or set yourself up on something like alltop.com where you can key in what your interests are and what blogs you'd like to follow.  They compile it for you on your personalized home page, making it a one-stop resource.  Add and delete as your interests and focus shifts.  When you find yourself with a moment or two, check out some of the titles, and read a post that hits home.  Not sure what or who you'd like to follow?  Give Stumbleupon a try and see what you come across.  Follow or bookmark sites that interest you.
• Create learning files.  I love using a 'shared' system like dropbox for this.  Whenever I am browsing for one thing on the internet, I inevitably stumble across an article, website, resource relating to something else.  Instead of getting pulled off track or losing out on the new information, I save it to my dropbox file so that I can return to it when I have a moment.  This means that whenever I find myself with a moment or two (waiting for appointments is always a popular one!) I access that file from any device and catch up on items I might have missed otherwise.  Sometimes important and informative, sometimes merely interesting, they often come together down the road in unexpected ways.
• Listen to books.  Many people don't like reading themselves, in which case audio books are a great alternative.  I love reading, but I listen to books in my car all the time.  If you spend time in a commute, spend time in the gym or on long runs, want to listen to something while you work on finishing that car engine or jigsaw puzzle, consider listening to a book, lecture or training program rather than music.  Use the time you have to learn something you might need.
• Check out TED talks.  If you haven't already you should.  Here you can listen to talks from the best of the best.  If you only have 5 minutes, do a search on 5 minute talks.  Search by topic, see what's new.  I have watched some talks on topics that I didn't think I'd be interested in only to be fascinated by new science, new technology, new research.  A great resource to access and a great platform for learning.  Or give youtube a closer look.  It is much more than simply a place to watch viral videos or talking animals.  

 Become what you need yourself to be to achieve what you want.  It's that simple and that challenging.  It does require you to start though.  Do one thing each day to move you forward.  Reading this was a good place to start.

Your Daily Plan for Success

I'm sure that you have a plan for your day; a to-do list, a schedule of appointments.  You may use a different system than I do (phone, computer, notebook) but you likely have a list of what needs to get done today and may already have things listed for tomorrow and subsequent days.

Have you ever wondered about what your daily agenda, your daily schedule of events, has to say about you?  John C. Maxwell, author of over 60 books on Leadership, says that...

The secret of your success is determined by your daily agenda

He believes that simply looking at how you structure and organize a 'typical' day, how you build your daily agenda, will provide him with firm insight into how successful you will ultimately become in life.

Let's face it.  Most of us merely jot down those items that we feel 'must' get done that day - those urgent and necessary activities.  However, this is just planning to 'keep up'.  In so doing, we are seriously underestimating the value and power of 'today'.  We leave for 'tomorrow' any thought or plan of our own growth and development.  

Instead, you need to have your own Personal Growth Plan. You need to have a vision for yourself of your development.  This is not something to leave to your boss, they will have their own agenda.  This is your agenda for you.  This is you crafting your life, the direction it will take, the role you'll play, the person you will become.  When you have created a strong enough vision for yourself, you need to build action steps into your plan.

Each day your agenda needs to include at least one thing you do to grow and develop.  One thing.  This is not something to be put off, this is not something to be deferred to the weekend.  Each day you need to take one step, however small, toward your growth.  Think of this as making a daily deposit into your bank account.  This is you investing in you.  Each day that you fail to make that contribution means that you will have that much less to work with at the end of the year and the longer you will have to 'save' until you can reap the rewards.

Consider how often we short-change ourselves.  Our daily agendas get packed full of action steps we feel we 'must' take in order to move other people's agendas forward.  Look at your list.  How much of your day is currently taken up with doing for others?  How many scheduled items on your list are you doing for your benefit?

Add one thing.  One thing each day, every day, that aids you in your Growth Plan.

No compromises.  No excuses.  If you want success in your life it begins...  today.  What's your one thing?

Out on a Limb

We do our best work when we are out on a limb.  No, not 'good' work, not 'gee I met deadline and
budget' work, not 'that'll keep me employed and might give me a raise at the end of the year work', I mean our very BEST work, our 'This will change the face of how people see me, buy stuff, think about stuff' work.

When we are out on a limb we are leading.  We hope others will see our vision and follow, but we start by being out there on our own making change.  We are pushing, pulling, stretching, transforming, challenging  the status quo in some way, and that requires us to take a risk.  We risk being mocked and ridiculed.  We risk being seen as wrong.  We risk being out on that limb alone... for a very long time... before others 'get' it and begin to follow us and we risk being out there alone with no one following us... ever.  

The problem, of course, is that it is damn uncomfortable out there on that limb.  Fear of falling (read... FAILING) keeps us playing it safe hugging the tree (read... maintaining the STATUS QUO).  Fear can make us give in to the pressures of others around us to conform.  Worrying about what our audience will think and say about what we're doing though will keep us tree-hugging forever.  In order to step away from the tree, and out on that limb, we have to be willing to let go of the thought that not everyone will 'get it', that not everyone will 'like it', that not everyone will 'buy it'.  And worse, of course, is the personalization of  'it', that people won't get us, like us, buy into us.

The sad truth though is that too many of us spend our lives hugging the tree and never step out to discover what we are capable of.  Our fears keep us clinging to the comfort and safety of the trunk and we fail to stretch ourselves, showing the world our very best selves.  

Where would we be if many before us had not gone out on a limb?

• Christopher Columbus
• Charles Darwin
• Albert Einstein
• Benjamin Franklin

And consider the impact of Steve Jobs, Mark Zuckerburg or, even... Sir Thomas Crapper (inventor of the flush toilet... seriously!)

The limb you step out on need not be one that will change the face of the world, but if you are taking a risk on something it will mean change of some kind, even if on a smaller scale, even if only of one... you.  Too nervous to try?  Test it out by going out on a limb a little closer to the ground first, one which has less of a fall.  There's less of a risk, less of a change involved, but it is still a step forward, still a step toward strengthening your balancing skills - preparing you for those limbs higher up.

I'm implementing some changes this year, in my business and personal life, that have me precariously perched on a limb that seems pretty high up there to me.  It represents big challenges and risks but I believe it's the next step for me and for my growth.  I hope that you will join me out there at some point, that you follow me as I make those steps and changes, but I am stepping out on that limb regardless.  It is going to be scary, it will be intimidating and I know it could be a big fall for me but, and here's the big plus for those of you ready to step out on a limb of your own... I hear the view is great from up there!