Ideally, we would have a story for ourselves that we love. A story that casts us as the hero, as someone deserving of love, recognition, success and joy. However, too many of us experience unhappiness, dissatisfaction and sometimes a feeling of worthlessness. If this sounds familiar, then it just might be time for you to question the story you're telling yourself!
Change your story, change your life (Anthony Robbins)
Our sense of dissatisfaction stems out of a gap between how we believe that things should be and how they truly are. Narrow or eliminate this gap and your level of satisfaction and joy increase proportionally. You need to shift your story though. Changing your perception of the shoulds in your life (what you should have, be and do) changes the yardstick by which you measure what you currently are, have and do. Measuring differently gives you different results!
We have all had difficult challenges to face in our lives. Life can be tough. The true challenge for us though rests in finding a way to use and learn from the tough moments and in not allowing ourselves to become lost in them. Sometimes these tough moments impact our story, in ways we didn't anticipate. Rather than letting these moments create gaps of disillusionment that we fall into and get swallowed up by, shift the story!
We may not have control over everything that life throws our way, but we always have control over how we choose to respond to those moments. Every time you choose to find a work-around or to push through those challenges, you strengthen your story and create a stronger plot line for yourself. The stronger you become and believe yourself to be, the more story possibilities that open themselves to you.
The end of your story doesn't exist yet. You can't yet know how your story will end. You are a writer in the process of creating the story of your life though. Isn't it time that you took control of your script, rather than letting others write it for you?
Sometimes we have lost track of our story, of what we want and believe for ourselves. To get closer to it...
Think about and identify one aspect of your life that you are currently very happy and satisfied with.
What is it about this that instills in you a sense of happiness?
What is the aspect of your story that it is fulfilling?
Now... think about and identify an area of your life in which you feel dissatisfaction and unhappiness.
What is it about this that instills you with that sense of unhappiness?
What is the aspect of your story that it is failing to fulfill?
Generally, we have three options for handling our areas of dissatisfaction. We can...
- Blame someone/something else - which drives our feelings of victimization
- Do nothing - which heightens our sense of dissatisfaction and helplessness
- Change our story and take a different path, gaining control over our lives and our satisfaction
What actions will you take? Recraft, rewrite your story to better support those new actions and direction. Given a choice, I will always want my personal life story to end with... and she lived happily ever after. Why would I ever want to settle for less?