- I can't...
- I'm not...
- I don't...
Unfortunately, each of these is also stated in absolute terms. It's these phrases that form the basis of our limiting beliefs, those beliefs that inhibit us from doing, trying or becoming sometimes the very things that we want for ourselves.
To move forward, we have to challenge these limiting belief systems. We have to reframe them to more positive statements that at least serve to open us to possibilities rather than cutting us off from them. For example,
- I'm not athletic. [Result - you won't engage in any athletic activity]
- I am athletic 'enough'. [Result - it creates the possibility for you to participate in athletic activities. It frees you from having to be great at them, or even good. You are athletic 'enough' to get off the couch and 'do' it! All too often we stop ourselves from engaging in activity we would enjoy, simply because we think we might not be any good at it. Think instead of only needing to be good enough. Far more open a belief!
- I am not good at speaking in public. [Result - I don't deliver presentations or speak up in meetings, costing me precious visibility within the company]
- I am able to speak convincingly with others, regardless of venue. [ Result - this sets the mindset that you will be confident and capable of speaking in public, allowing your brain to set you up for success instead of failure! The brain likes to give you what you ask of it. Ask it to fail and it will. Ask for something positive and specific and it is far more likely to ensure that's what you get]
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